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Dear
Christine,
For years I dated a guy who was possessive and
temperamental.
A male friend confessed he’s had a crush on me for a year.
Our flirtations escalated to intimacy, and I broke up with my boyfriend. I was shocked
when my new lover didn’t end things with his girlfriend.
The ex began
calling and proposed marriage. I was reluctant but frustrated, so I said yes. Although
upset by the engagement, my lover said he’s happy if I’m happy. Then he broke up with
his girlfriend, and he’s been around more than ever. On the other hand, there’s a new
girl in his life.
If he told me not to go though with this marriage, I
wouldn’t. Should I confront him? What if I make a fool of myself? -- FRETFUL FIANCE –
PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA
Dear Fretful,
Don’t
worry about making a fool of yourself; it’s far too late for that.
You’ve
been with Mr. Possessive too long. Why are you waiting for the new guy to tell you not to
marry a man you don’t want to be with? He can’t even make up his own mind about who he
wants to be with.
Okay, first things first—call off the engagement.
Immediately.
Why are you so needy? You knew the first guy was bad news,
but you only broke up with him after finding a replacement. Then you only agreed to marry
him because your lover wasn’t a sure thing. It’s time for you to stop depending on a man
to complete you.
If you must continue with your drama, tell the second
guy how you feel. But most importantly, slow down. Soap operas are best left to daytime
TV.
Dear Christine,
I fell head-over-heels
for a guy I was seeing. He was sent out of town to work for six months, and we stayed in
touch as much as possible. When he returned, he told me he’d met a girl and moved in
with her, but he insisted we remain friends. I agreed because I didn’t want to lose him
completely.
He gave me his address and told me to call him if I was ever
in the area, so we could catch up and I could meet his girlfriend. Curiosity got the
best of me, so I called him a month later when I was (conveniently) in the area. He asked
me to call back the next night. I did, and he didn’t answer.
What’s his
problem? What should I do to get my pride back? -- ANNA – GUELPH,
ONTARIO
Dear Anna,
He doesn’t have a problem. You
do. Face it; he’s over you.
People are always saying things they don’t
mean, like “If you’re ever in the neighborhood, look me up.” He was merely trying to
soften your landing after having dropped you. I’m sure he didn’t think you’d want to
meet the new girlfriend. After all, she’s your replacement.
The best way
to get your pride back is to move on.
Have a question, a thought, or a
story to share (anonymity guaranteed)? Email Christine at:
single@keynotebooks.com
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