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Ah, those she-devils of the silver screen! The
diabolical divas frighten us with their dastardly deeds, yet still manage to inspire a
bow (but don’t bow for too long because you might get stabbed in the back!). In an
informal, highly unscientific online survey of about 75 friends, I asked, “Who is your
favorite cinema villainess?” The results are often unexpected, yet have an “oh yeah!”
quality. People definitely have strong opinions about why their evil icon was the
worst.
1. Tied for first place is Glenn Close in “Fatal Attraction”
(1987). Her unforgettable Alex Forrest boiling rabbits, kidnaping children, and throwing
acid on cars, all in an effort to get a married man’s attention can’t be forgotten. “I
won’t be ignored, Dan!” she cries. A butcher-knife confrontation with Dan’s hapless wife
ensures that she won’t. Close’s portrayal of a lonely yet dangerous woman creates a
classic she-monster.
2. Sharing the top prize is Cruella De Vil from
“101 Dalmatians” (1961). Voiced by Betty Lou Gerson, P.E.T.A. Public Enemy Number One
goes to extremes to get the skins of the aforementioned cute puppies to make a coat. How
gauche! Hasn’t De Vil ever heard of silver fox? Curiously enough, the
aforementioned Glenn Close also plays De Vil in the 1996 live-action remake and its
sequel “102 Dalmatians” (2000).
3. Crossing species lines, voters gave
“two-claws-up” for the Alien Queen of James Cameron’s “Aliens” (1986). She’s
temperamental, hisses provocatively, and possesses a killer overbite. Who can forget that
great cinematic moment when the extra-terrestrially-challenged Sigourney Weaver confronts
the Alien Queen: “Get away from her, you bitch!” The star-power of this gory gorgon spans
five movies – even “Alien vs. Predator” (2004)!
4. Playing another
kind of monster, Faye Dunaway portrays classic movie actress Joan Crawford in “Mommie
Dearest” (1981). The movie’s tagline: “A star...a legend...and a mother. The illusion of
perfection.” Well, if your idea of maternal perfection involves childrearing with
wire-hangers... It is no small feat that Dunaway outdoes the larger-than-life Crawford in
this camp classic. So much so that “Mommie Dearest” has been described as the first
comedy about child abuse.
5. In “Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?” (1962),
Bette Davis goes Grand Guignol. Former child star Jane Hudson imprisons and tortures her
wheelchair-bound sister Blanche, all in the name of a misguided vaudeville comeback.
Jane’s escapades include downsizing her maid with a hammer and hauling out her half-dead
sister for ice cream at the beach. Dark fun, indeed.
6. Michelle
Pfeiffer’s Catwoman claws her way to the top in “Batman Returns” (1992) as a gal who’s
better when she’s bad...and dead. Outshining even the scenery-chewing evil boss
Christopher Walken, Pfeiffer’s performance proves her career has nine
lives.
7. Maleficent in “Sleeping Beauty” (1959) sure holds a grudge!
Sporting a black horned headpiece and cape ensemble, the snubbed fairy casts a curse on a
beautiful princess. Talk about being slipped a roofie. After a hundred-or-so-years of
beauty sleep, I hope the princess was served breakfast in bed by Prince Charming. But
nothing beats a dramatic transformation into a dragon! Tied for seventh place is the
Wicked Queen from “Snow White” (1937), voiced by Lucille La Verne. Animated vanity never
looked so malevolent...or elegant.
8. In “Basic Instinct” (1992), Sharon
Stone plays Catherine Tramell, a brilliant bisexual serial killer who favors dispatching
victims with an ice pick. Julia Roberts, Kathleen Turner, and even Cher were all rumored
to have turned down this role, which made Stone a bonafide star. Michael Douglas plays a
cop who can’t resist danger of this underwear-deprived femme fatale. Hey, didn’t he learn
anything from “Fatal Attraction”?
9. Ursula the Sea Witch from “The Little
Mermaid” (1989) knows how to cook up a scheme. Voiced by Pat Carroll, the octopus queen
grants the mermaid Ariel legs but drives a harder bargain than a loan shark. Also, a
sentimental favorite that ties for ninth is the Wicked Witch of the West from “The Wizard
of Oz” (1939). Margaret Hamilton haunted our youth with her viridescent complexion and
shrill shrieks, only a little more than her 1970’s coffee commercials.
10.
As The Great Tyrant in “Barbarella” (1968), vamp Anita Pallenberg makes a grand entrance
by purring “My pretty, pretty,” to Jane Fonda. Sex! Sci-fi! Go-go boots! Rolling Stones
groupie Pallenberg’s “mod” scientist villainess inspires a
camp-classic-in-waiting.
Honorable Mentions:
Beware
Samara Morgan in “The Ring” (2002)! “Be kind -- rewind!” takes on a sinister edge when a
pissed-off phantom (played by Daveigh Chase) attacks victims via a cursed videotape.
Bone-chilling fun.
Linda Fiorentino is the unapologetically evil Bridget
Gregory in “The Last Seduction” (1994). She steals her husband’s money and skips town,
throwing him to the mercy of loan sharks. She hooks up with a hayseed and then frames him
for rape and murder. (Unfortunately, Fiorentino’s tour-de-force performance was
disqualified at the time for an Oscar nomination because the picture was originally
slated for HBO.) Female villainy never was so smart, scheming and seductive.
Noel Ambery II has written a soon-to-be-published novel
about a very evil villainess.
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