Girl Guide Leader discussing First Aid
Leader: “When you’re putting a splint on someone, be creative. You can
use a piece of wood as a splint for a leg or arm, or a close pin as a splint for a
finger. Anything hard.”
Girl Guide: “Can you use a
plate?”
Leader looks at Girl Guide in
bewilderment.
Girl Guide Leader demonstrating CPR on a
victim
Leader: “If you walk into a situation where someone may be
unconscious, first you have to try to wake them up.” Leader shakes victim. “Hello, hello,
are you all right?”
Girl Guide: “What if they’re sleeping and they’re
deaf?”
Leader looks at Girl Guide in
bewilderment.
Father showing a magic trick to his
daughter
Daughter: “Can you tell me how it
works?”
Father: “Now, what’s the first rule of a
magician?”
Daughter: “A magician never tells his
secret.”
Father: “Well, if you know the rule, then why are you asking how
the trick works?”
Daughter: “Yah, but I am
hungry.”
Father looks at daughter in
bewilderment.
Two children at the hairdressers with their
mother
Hairdresser: “Okay, Tommy, are you ready to
go?”
Daughter: “No, I wanna go first. I called it.”
Mother:
“Just let your brother go first this time, okay?”
Daughter: Putting her
hands over her face and whaling, “Tommy, why do you always have to ruin my
life?!!!”
Mother, hairdresser, and customers stare at the child whose life
has been ruined.
Mother talking to her
daughter
Mother: “What did you do at school
today?”
Daughter: “Nothin’.”
Mother: “Well, you must have
done something. Did you play with anyone?”
Daughter:
“Yah.”
Mother: “What did you play?”
Daughter: “I don’
remember.” (Sighs in frustration.)
Mother: “I’m not trying to bug you. I’m
just trying to get inside your head.”
Daughter: “Well, I had a key for it,
but I lost it.”
Mother: (Sighing) “If only it were that easy.”