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These days, it seems like there are so many things going on—so many business trips and committee meetings and social events and playdates and everything else—that some of the most important things tend to get lost in the shuffle. You know—things like your marriage. But in his latest book, The Ten-Minute Marriage Principle: Quick, Daily Steps for Refreshing Your Relationship, Christian counselor and marriage expert Douglas Weiss explains how couples can strengthen their relationship by setting aside just a few minutes every day.
Weiss begins the book by explaining his Ten-Minute Marriage Principle—which consists of daily exercises that help you understand and appreciate your spouse more. Weiss offers 10 different exercises—from sharing feelings to expressing gratitude to reminiscing…or even just gazing into each other’s eyes—that will help to bring couples closer together.
Since the Ten-Minute Marriage Principle is a pretty simple idea, it only takes up the first 48 pages of the book. After that, Weiss goes into various other topics relating to marriage. Starting with some basic psychology lessons, he then moves into a number of typical marital issues—and how to address them and work through them as a team. He teaches readers how to have the Ten-Minute Argument and discusses building your Ten-Minute Team. And he covers everything from decision making to finances and everything in between.
You don’t have to be struggling in your relationship to benefit from Weiss’s suggestions. Whether you’re newly married or you’ve been married for decades—and whether you’re happily married or on the brink of marital disaster—you’ll be sure to find something in this book that will help you strengthen your relationship. You’ll learn new things about yourself and your spouse, and you’ll gain new tools for addressing issues before they turn into problems.
That’s not to say, of course, that you’ll agree with everything in the book. While I found that the basic ideas were solid, I was skeptical about others. Some of the exercises Weiss suggests will definitely challenge you—and even if you don’t follow through with all of them, they’ll still leave you with some valuable new insights. Most importantly, The Ten-Minute Marriage Principle offers all kinds of great suggestions that will help you reinforce your marriage—and your other relationships, too. It brings up issues that you probably never really thought about, and it helps you initiate important discussions about some basic but crucial topics—as well as some difficult topics that you may have been avoiding for years.
The Ten-Minute Marriage Principle isn’t always a comfortable read, but it’s definitely an insightful read. And since all it takes is just a few minutes every day to start giving your marriage a boost, it’s worth checking out.
