Read Time:2 Minute, 7 Second
I have always been a sleeper.
When I was a kid, I loved weekends only
because I could sleep until noon. Forget
about Batman or Speedy Gonzales or the Pink Panther, I was out until lunch.
Nobody would look twice at my sleep obsession if I lived in another
country.
Say, in Spain, where taking a siesta is as much a part of your day as
eating
lunch. But, come to think of it, I’ll bet siestas are for men in
Spain.
Senora has floors to sweep and tortillas to make. I’m pretty sure she
isn’t
allowed a leisurely nap. The same goes for many places in Europe
where
shops and restaurants are closed for several hours each day, so
the
proprietor can eat lunch and take an afternoon rest. Again, I’m betting
that
naptime there is for the male population, too. (Maybe honeymooners get a break.) I’ve
never seen commercials featuring Mama Mia types fanning themselves in the hammock; she’s
too busy making the sauce.
I know Japan condones “power naps,” but I
need a larger dose of the good
stuff. I’ll take two hours,
please.
But as much as I like to snooze, everything has to be
just right. No music playing, no television blaring, and no faucets dripping. Rain is
good; the sound of a fan is nice, too, but no snoring from other people who share
my
hobby.
And I need my bed to be perfect. No waterbeds sloshing.
You know, the kind
that has too much water or needs to be filled, or the heater’s too
hot or not
hot enough? No air mattresses to make me sweat in the dead of
winter
either. I want a nice, firm mattress, with clean cotton sheets. Give me
one
pillow, not two or three, and at least two blankets, if you please. No
Afghans with
holes to let in cold air. No throws. I need a real blanket.
Better yet, a comforter,
or better still, a quilt and a comforter.
You want to really make me
happy? Add a fan that purrs like a kitten to
drown out the noise, and turn off the
phone. It’s not like I don’t have an
answering machine! For those special times, a
good dose of Tylenol PM
really sets the mood, and of course, Karen Neuburger pajamas
are the most
comfortable things to have on. (Just ask Oprah who recommended
them
first.)
With those simple things in place, I can do what I do
best. So leave me
alone, I need some more rest!
Kristin Dreyer Kramer has been writing in some form or another (usually when she was supposed to be doing something else) since the ripe old age of ten—when she, her cousin, and their two Cabbage Patch Dolls formed the Poo Authors’ Club. After a short career in advertising, Kristin got sick of always saying nice things about stuff that didn’t deserve it—so now she spends her days criticizing things, and she’s much happier for it.
Since creating NightsAndWeekends.com in February of 2002, Kristin has spent her life surrounded by piles and piles of books and movies—so many that her office has become a kind of entertainment obstacle course.
As if her writing and editing responsibilities for N&W.com weren’t enough to keep her out of trouble, Kristin also hosts a number of weekly radio shows: Reel Discovery, Shelf Discovery, and On the Marquee. She’s also a proud member of the Broadcast Film Critics Association (CriticsChoice.com), the Central Ohio Film Critics Association (COFCA.org), the Online Film Critics Society (OFCS.org), and the Women Film Critics Circle (WFCC.Wordpress.com).
Kristin lives in Columbus, Ohio, with her husband, Paul, and their daughter, Anna. She welcomes questions, comments, and fan mail at kdk@nightsandweekends.com.
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Kristin Dreyer Kramer has been writing in some form or another (usually when she was supposed to be doing something else) since the ripe old age of ten—when she, her cousin, and their two Cabbage Patch Dolls formed the Poo Authors’ Club. After a short career in advertising, Kristin got sick of always saying nice things about stuff that didn’t deserve it—so now she spends her days criticizing things, and she’s much happier for it.
Since creating NightsAndWeekends.com in February of 2002, Kristin has spent her life surrounded by piles and piles of books and movies—so many that her office has become a kind of entertainment obstacle course.
As if her writing and editing responsibilities for N&W.com weren’t enough to keep her out of trouble, Kristin also hosts a number of weekly radio shows: Reel Discovery, Shelf Discovery, and On the Marquee. She’s also a proud member of the Broadcast Film Critics Association (CriticsChoice.com), the Central Ohio Film Critics Association (COFCA.org), the Online Film Critics Society (OFCS.org), and the Women Film Critics Circle (WFCC.Wordpress.com).
Kristin lives in Columbus, Ohio, with her husband, Paul, and their daughter, Anna. She welcomes questions, comments, and fan mail at kdk@nightsandweekends.com.