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I got bored and popped in a compilation of music videos from the mid- to late-eighties and spent the next eight hours on rock-n-roll memory lane. What fun! Don’t ask me where my sanity went. See how many songs you can find hidden in my conglomeration of memories.
Skid Row, I remember you; does anyone else? 18 and life. That’s why we don’t play with guns. See, I learned something from a bunch of longhaired guys in leather pants, screaming into a microphone.
Bang Tango? What the heck? I have the sudden urge to cough. He makes my throat hurt. Must be related to Korn.
Warrant-cute blonde, but take a gander at that guitar player. I’ll be his cherry pie anytime. I wonder if they ever got dirty, rotten, filthy, stinking rich?
Dangerous Toys liked being scared. The lead singer bares a striking resemblance to Zooey Deschanel. Scary for her, but maybe they’re related, too.
Hey, Starship did have more than a city built on Rock-n-Roll before disappearing
into the black hole called the 90’s.
Axel Rose and the way he moved his hips while he sang, ooh la la. I need oxygen here! With one of the most unique voices in the business, Guns-N-Roses transcends time. My teenage sons listen to them. Sweet Child O’ Mine will always be my favorite rock song, and Axel Rose will forever remain the only man, besides Jon Bon Jovi, who didn’t look gay in leather pants.
Ah, Bon Jovi! Didn’t their keyboard player release a single? Maybe it was the guitar player? Actually, I think it was both. Who would have thought that one day Bon Jovi would be the first rock band with a number one hit on the country charts, with Jennifer Nettles, no less – hey, Babe, could you tone down the twang a bit. A bit more. A little bit more. Just a tad more. Who says you can’t go home again?
Ugh, what’s with this Annie Lennox song? Can’t say why I recorded that one.
Tina Turner and her great legs and that horse she thinks is simply the best. What? You think she feels that way about a man?
Poco? Ooh! Ooh! Is that the Diet Coke guy in the video? Come on, you gals remember the Diet Coke Guy, don’t you? I’ll call it love!
John Waite and that girly haircut – I used to think he was cute. Ick! Unpleasant shudder. Ack! Ugh! Gag! Okay, I’m better now. Who did he want to see smile again?
I once thought Alice Cooper was sexy as all get out. My mind must have been full of poison! No wonder Mom and Dad wouldn’t let me date. If I’d brought home something like that, daddy would’ve mistaken him for a deranged weasel with bushy, black eyebrows and shot him.
Someone please explain to me how “The Love Shack” became such a huge hit? Bang, bang on the door, Baby. What on earth is henroo rusty? Or is that just a case of misheard lyrics?
Fiona – whoa! You know, the girl who thought the lead singer of Winger was sexing her? I used to want to look like her. Umm – I still do.
Aw, I really liked Milli Vanilli. Too bad it was only Memorex. I wonder if they blamed it on the rain? I’ll say no more – their story is a tragic one.
Kiss – oh, my gosh. Paul Stanley still does it for me – forget Gene Simmons and his tongue – I’d better hide my heart. Need that oxygen again, pronto!
Did your sugar daddy give you candy? Uh – never mind – hey, I didn’t know that was The Thompson Twins. Hold me now.
Phil Collins so doesn’t look like an 80’s rocker – not enough hair, but man can he sing! He reminds me that there’s three million homeless in Paradise. He’s kinda cute, though.
Fine Young Cannibals – don’t know what to say about them other than the lead singer sings with his tongue, which drives me crazy in a bad way. Looks like someone eating cold, fried potatoes.
Is that Darryl Hannah Michael Bolton can’t live without?
Come on fatso, just bust a move with Young MC. Now I know where my bike shorts and sports bra craze stage originated.
For some reason Slash makes me think of Alice in Wonderland. Didn’t one of the characters wear a hat like that? Sorry, Guns-N-Roses again where the grass is green and the girls are pretty.
Soulsister? Snappy tune. Hope they found their way to her heart. Reminded me of an ugly version of Savage Garden. That is so not nice of me, but the blonde favors Dennis Leary. Still not being very nice, am I?
Ratt read Romeo & Juliet before going round and round????
Tom Petty and the vampires move west down Ventura Boulevard free falling.
George Michael’s gotta have faith with that sexy beard stubble, sunglasses, and tight butt. Whew! Haul in another oxygen tank for me.
John Cougar fights authority and never wins, but he makes it hurt so good!
Pour some sugar on me, Def Leppard. That’s where my brother got the ripping-holes-in-his-jeans-on-purpose thing to our mother’s horror. It’s the only time having a hole in the ass of your jeans was considered cool.
A woman sung Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap? Wait, I think that’s the cover of an AC/DC song. Who is that? Joan Jett? She’s prettier than I remember.
Tracy Chapman’s fast car didn’t take her far. Too bad, I liked her brand of music.
How on earth did Steven Tyler get away with walking out on stage? That dude certainly doesn’t look like a lady. Love the music, though.
Tetra?
Oh, gosh, it’s Prince – make that The Artist Formally Known as Prince. What’s with this Batman thing? All that purple and weird, too.
Bang Tango again, breaking up a heart of stone – still makes me want to cough.
How in the heck did Alan Jackson get on this tape? Shrieking with laughter here. I think I was just jolted back into this decade-here in the real world.
Alice Cooper again-let’s build a house of fire, Baby. You know, actually, he’s not that bad looking. Oh, boy, I’ve been watching way too many music videos this afternoon-the music version of beer goggles and all that.
Motley Crue and Dr. Feelgood can’t stop my heart. Ouch! No wonder I’m half deaf in my old age. Pass the aspirin please.
Debbie Gibson – the 80’s version of Britany Spears, only not as wild and bubble-headed, but she tends to get lost in some guys freaky blue eyes.
Kix – don’t close your eyes or you’ll miss them. Trix are for kids – wait a minute, that’s the bunny rabbit and the whole cereal thing.
Gasp! Not one Michael Jackson song on this tape. I thought he was sexy until he started going all white on me. I’m bad.
